Manifesting, Creating the Life You Want, and Living by Design

SEASON 1: EPISODE 5

Published 05/10/2020

Amy: In this episode, we discuss manifesting. Can we create our own reality? How are we able to manifest what we want, and are we satisfied that we get it? How does Human Design view this process differently from many other teachings? You’ll hear from our hosts today, three Projectors who have explored this theme personally and professionally over many years. We hope you enjoy the discussion.

Today, we’re sitting together to talk about the topic of manifesting. For those of you who have been working with Human Design, you may have a particular awareness of how the word manifesting or more the term being a Manifestor works in terms of Human Design. We wanted to start the conversation by talking about the concept in general, especially because it seems that now in a lot of realms of self-improvement, or different programs that are out there, and the way that different systems approach how we can create our lives, there’s often a lot of talk about how to manifest what you want, or how to be able to manifest within your own reality.

We wanted to start the conversation by talking about what that looks like from the view of a few different perspectives, and also what we’re seeing in terms of how people are creating in their lives, and in bringing things into form, bringing things into manifestation. One way to talk about it is if we just look at the word in and of itself as a general concept. Usually, when people are talking about manifesting, they’re talking about, “How do I bring something into my reality? How do I bring something to fruition?” I’m wondering with all three of us here, if we can maybe explore that first, to just talk about what we see out in the world, in terms of how people are going about that and what they’re doing with that?

John: For me, this idea of manifesting relates to having a vision, something that you want, or something you’d like to see happen. Then, using either your intention or your energy to move in that direction to bring it into form, make it a reality. I think a lot of that comes up in regards to having a certain quality of life, the expectations in terms of the life that you’d like to have. Can I bring that into form? What can I do to make that happen?

Amy: It seems like there’s some teachings, or some ways of working with it, where there’s a lot of focus on visioning. You’re literally visualizing the outcome you want to see. Then, I’ve seen some teachings that seem to focus on feeling, not only do you focus on visualizing what you want to have happen, but you focus on generating within yourself the feeling state that you want to have. In some ways, manifesting might be about material things. It might be about manifesting something physical or something literal, but it also seems to be about manifesting a kind of quality of life, quality of experience, or general state of being or feeling like I want to manifest happiness, or I want to manifest the sense of having a purpose and knowing what that is and feeling that I’m on purpose. It can go to the other end of you know, I want a new car. I want a nicer house. I want to live in a beautiful setting. I want to have certain kinds of relationships in my life. I wonder what the origin or the impetus of that is for a lot of people. I’d imagine that for a lot of people, the impetus might be because there’s some kind of pain or dissatisfaction with life the way it is. So, they want something else, they want to feel something else, or they are wanting to experience something else. Maybe for other people, there’s a sense that there’s just something more out there or they have this idea that there’s something else they could be having in their lives and they want to go after that.

Kendra: Designer experience versus experience by design.

Amy: That’s an interesting way to put it. Can you explain the difference a little more?

Kendra: It’s the sense of going after something because of the way that we think it will feel or trying to align ourselves with a particular kind of experience that we want to have, versus allowing the experience to reveal itself. I’m speaking from the perspective of being an Emotional Projector. Oftentimes, in the experience of learning the emotional wave, there is this sense of wanting to get to a certain place in the feeling state or wanting to even avoid the low end of the wave and not feel good, and if I can just focus enough on the positive feelings, and elicit that state in my body, then I can step into that experience, and attract more of the same into my life. Rather than appreciating the depth and the nuance of every experience, as it reveals itself, really appreciate the information that comes along through every step of the wave. In acknowledging the things that we know about Design, we learn about what our authority is, or as a project are learning to trust in life and how things come to the Projector as we align with our unique frequency.

Amy: The way you’re talking about it brings up this polarity for me between whether you want to think of it as masculine/feminine, or yin/yang, how much do we receive from our experience? How much do we take in what’s showing up for us? How much agency or potential do we think we have, to be able to create that experience or have something that we direct happen in life? It’s interesting to relate it back to Human Design and look at the way Human Design holds it because there is a particular way to hold that polarity based on Design. I’ve definitely explored more than a few different self-improvement or life-enrichment-type programs that go after this in a lot of different ways. I’m curious about where that feeling comes from within us or how we orient ourselves to receptivity versus assertiveness or creation.

John: It seems to be coming from this sense that if we don’t do it, if we don’t make it happen, it won’t happen. We can see a lot of conditioning in our society around that. For example, the Nike campaign and their slogan, “Just Do It.” To me, that just represents this kind of Manifestor orientation that we’ve been fed. If you want something, go out and do it, go grab the bull by the horns and make it happen. That’s understandable. It makes sense on a certain level, but going back to what you’re saying about Human Design, that’s really only appropriate for about roughly 10% of the population. Other factors aside, from talking about Generators, or Projectors, or Reflectors, for example, there’s this process of waiting, or this ‘wait and see’ approach, or just accepting things as they are in the moment and then seeing what life brings in whether through an invitation or through response can’t help but think about the amount of manifesting conditioning in society.

Kendra: It seems helpful to kind of note the distinction between Manifestation as it’s considered in conventional terms, like how it gets thrown around out there, versus what a Manifestor is or what manifesting means in the Human Design System. I wonder if either of you would like to speak to that point?

John: I think it can be really helpful to look at things that way. For example, looking at the BodyGraph, and if we’re looking at a chart and we’re seeing what kind of chart it is. What is the energetic pattern here? What’s the archetype? One of the things we look for in a Manifestor’s chart is having a motor connected or defined to the throat through a Channel that brings the possibility of using one’s internal energy to create something or bring something into form without having to wait for outside conditions to change. For example, to wait for the right time, place, or energy to be available either through the transit field, through a relationship, or through an interaction.

As I was saying, roughly 10% of the population has that definition and Design. The other 90%, it’s conditional, it depends on the energy that’s available from the outside, and the conditions that the person finds themself in within a relationship or a situation. On a strictly mechanical level in Design, we’re talking about something pretty specific, specific energetics, or mechanics that are underlying the event or what we’re talking about. I think in general, in society, it’s more about people wanting to create a certain life that they want, or they want to have a certain quality of experience. I tend to look at it through my definition, in my Design, in my view, is survival. I see it as people wanting to survive. How do I survive in a way that’s either meaningful or how do I experience success or peace? How do I do more than just survive on the most basic level, but have a certain quality of experience? It’s very understandable that we all want that on some level, to have a certain quality of life here.

Amy: As you’re saying that, it’s making me think about if we’re talking about the term, generally, as each of us come into life, from a very young age, we’re immediately taking in all kinds of conditioning. It’s part of the intelligence of human psychology and development. As soon as we come in, we’re starting to assess on many different levels from conscious to deeply pre-conscious or subconscious. We’re sort of assessing, “How does this world work? What are the rules? What do I get rewarded for? What do I get punished for? What do people view as good? What do people view as bad?” As children, I think we’re automatically taking in all of this.

The first thing I think that most children do, if they can, is they kind of adapt to whatever those moralities, beliefs, or conditions are. If you’re looking at young adults, or people as they start to grow up and come into their own, part of this desire to manifest is coming out of the desire to throw off some of that conditioning. It’s almost like I’ve been told this is how the world is. “I’ve been told this is how I need to be educated,” or, “I’ve been told this is what success is,” and we sort of work with that as best we can.

If it’s not really working out, I wonder if part of the impetus is something in us that is saying, “No, I want to do it my way. I’m not winning this game the way it’s been fed to me. This doesn’t work for me.” I see some people who are really able to work with the game, they work with the conditioning, and they’re able to figure out how to win at it. Maybe they get a great degree, or they figure out how to make a lot of money and be successful financially, or they figure out how to sustain a bunch of relationships. At some point, they get to a place where it’s not quite meaningful enough, or maybe this isn’t what they actually want. Now, how do they go after what they really value or the life or what they actually want to experience? Some of that might be the fighter in us, the individuality in us, or something in us that just wants something different. Then, there’s this additional layer of conditioning, I think, especially in the US, that’s like, well, if you want it, you gotta go make it happen.

John: It’s interesting to look at it that way. It brings to mind the entrepreneurial culture, there are a lot of people out there working in jobs or situations that aren’t bringing a lot of meaning or satisfaction to their life. They may have been told that this is what you do- you graduate from college and go to work for a company. At some point, they may find it’s not really lighting them up anymore. It’s not really bringing the satisfaction, success, or meaning to their life that they had hoped. You see this kind of movement away from that.

What’s becoming more common, at least here in the US, is the entrepreneurial culture. People will have a vision or have something that they want to implement, a new career, a certain lifestyle, or to go make a lot of money so they are not so stressed about money anymore, and to do it their way. I applaud it. I think it’s great to see people making those moves, and in a way taking responsibility for their sense of well-being and happiness to whatever degree possible.

It does beg the question to me, is that just another script or narrative that is maybe preferable in some ways to the conditioning that says you go get a job and go sit at a company, a cube for 10 years, or some version of that? Now, everyone’s running around, at least a lot of people that I know, and going at it on their own which does appeal to me. At the same time, I wonder, “What are the real results of that?” Is it just another formula that we’ve taken from the outside that we’re trying to apply to our lives because it worked for somebody else? Does it respect the individual differences that we all have?

Amy: I wonder if we could take the point that you’re making, given that we’re all Projectors here, and we could each talk a little bit about our own experience of what this was like for each of us? How have we gone through this process of either deconditioning or this concept of being able to create some kind of life we want? I’d love to know with each of you, what’s been your personal relationship with that. Then, maybe even share how human design helped you with this concept of manifesting a life and creating a life for yourself. Kendra, would you like to jump in on that a little bit and share about your experience?

Kendra: I can fully relate to the vision boarding experience. Coming from a hope motivation, and a view of possibility, it really spoke to me. To see everything you want, to put it on a vision board, feel all the feelings, and have the thing you want. This thing of going after something, and for the Projector, focusing one’s attention on it so intently. We are designed to focus, maybe in some ways, we are actually able to cycle back around and have the thing that we’re focusing on. There does seem to be some level of truth to resonance, whatever we’re resonating with, we seem to bump into those things when we relate it with the law of attraction. So I have gone through these visualization classes and processes and things where I’ve been able to actually quote, unquote, manifest the thing that I wanted, but then what’s the cost or the result of that experience? For example, trying to take my art to a certain level, producing an event, or going after something, because I was encouraged by the outside world to go after that thing, and then just ending up in complete exhaustion afterward. I’m wondering if that was something I actually wanted to do. That’s a little bit about my experience with it.

Amy: It seems like some of it might be a trial-and-error process. For a lot of us, I think it’s a natural part of our development to say, “Hey, maybe I’m just going to see if I can create what I want.” You’re saying, “Make the vision board,” or “Focus your intention on it,” or “Think about it and feel into it.” Maybe it’s a bit of a trial-and-error process to see if you’re able to then get the thing that you wanted. When you get it, do you like it? Is it enjoyable? There’s that phrase like, “Be careful what you wish for,” or sometimes when we do actually get the thing that we designed, the designer life that that we’ve created, or some aspects of it, does it actually feel the way we think it’s going to? Does it fulfill us the way we want? Do you have a personal experience with that where once some of these things started to come in, were you happy with it?

Kendra: Having a relationship come in or a certain experience around music, or my coaching practice- practical real-life examples. Where then, I lean back into the rest of my Design with this eternally indecisive structure and this up-and-down feeling through all the emotions of something. Things are constantly moving, that’s life, and that’s energy. That’s what keeps things interesting and helps us grow. When you try to hold on to a particular experience or make things be a certain way, I mean, is that actually fulfilling?

Amy: I can remember being in a lot of different programs or classes with the vision boards, with the mock-ups, with focusing on the energy, or the feeling you want to have. The ones that were more energetic were a little bit easier for me. Given my Design as a Mental Projector, the visioning board thing or the sitting down and sort of mapping out everything in your life- like I went through one process in a workshop where it was kind of like you sit down and map out everything in your life exactly the way you want it. It was mind mapping, you create this whole thing. For me, it just felt incredibly overwhelming. It almost felt like I didn’t want that much responsibility. A lot of sight therapists that I’ve been to would say, “Oh, well, this is because you haven’t developed enough agency in yourself,” or, “You don’t believe you’re worth getting to have what you actually want.” I don’t know if that’s true.

I was sitting in this mind mapping workshop one time with my husband, who’s an Emotional Manifesting Generator. We get this assignment, and immediately, he’s got this poster board size thing filled to the gills with teeny tiny writing, every piece of whitespace filled, and I’ve got like a heart in the middle. I’m looking at him just like, “Good lord, what is all that?” For me, it wasn’t natural to go after creating my life in that way.

I think what I found with Human Design was that there was some kind of permission in it to sit back and get in touch with my own receptivity. It opened up this concept, which actually felt much more natural to me, that I could actually be receptive to a life coming to me that would be something beyond what I would have imagined for myself. This concept of, “Oh, actually, there’s a life that’s already here for you. If you’re aligned with your nature, you just get to receive it and discover what that is.” To me, that felt like such a relief. I’m curious about that. I want to know about that, and I think it opened up a feeling of a lot less control and a lot less conventional success. It made my life a lot more interesting and brought a lot more of the unexpected, I would say, into my experience.

John: There’s this type of vanity that we all have, and I guess have to work with, to varying degrees. We believe or operate through a perspective that we know what our life is supposed to be about, or that we know what is best for us or supposed to happen. If we can switch gears, be a little bit more receptive, hold back a little bit, and see what’s actually here. What am I working with? What’s coming towards me? To have a direct relationship with that, that’s based on our experience and things as they are in that moment, versus where we’d like them to be or what we could imagine. I don’t know that it’s kind of an either-or thing completely, that we have to do completely one or the other. It does seem when we talk about this, this manifesting orientation, that it doesn’t seem to be very receptive. It feels like it’s more about imposing something on your life, like a template or a desire, as opposed to relaxing into oneself and what’s actually correct or healthy for you. Waiting to see what life has in store for you.

Going back to this kind of belief that if we’re too passive, we don’t force it, or we don’t initiate it, I’m not going to get it or I’m not going to be able to survive or my life is not going to be okay, on some level. When I was speaking earlier, I realized that a lot of the time, it’s autobiographical, and kind of like Kendra was sharing about her experience. It’s interesting looking back on mine from the point of view of being a Projector, even before I had been exposed to Human Design or knew anything about it. I realized that I really don’t like working very much. I don’t really want to work. I remember looking around at my peers, in high school even, and into college, and they were so sure about what they were going to do in the world. “I’m gonna go be a doctor, lawyer, or musician,” and I was like, “Wow, how do you know? I don’t want to do any of that. I just want to live, I just want to have a good experience in life. I want to live my life fully, whatever that means.” I didn’t really know what that meant. It was just an ongoing process of discovery, but through, I don’t know whether you’d call it the program, the conditioning, or the influences that are coming in from our friends, family, society, educational system, we end up being kind of shuttled into this template, the system. This is the formula, this is how it works, you go to school, you get your degree, and you go get a job.

I found myself in that world, working essentially like a super generator. I worked for software companies for years, until I realized that it felt very out of alignment with who I was, what I was really about, and the experiences I wanted to have in life. I ended up leaving a company that I had been with for eight years, and then went to another company, a smaller company, a startup, and ended up working even harder there. I started going into what turned out to be severe burnout. I eventually just hit the eject button, and I was just like, “I can’t, I literally, physically, can’t keep this up. If I do continue down this path, I’m probably going to end up in the hospital.” Even then, what was my move? What did I do? I went out on my own. I wouldn’t quite call it an entrepreneurial path, but I went out as an independent web developer and as a consultant, then I ended up picking up a whole lot of projects and working even harder because I was trying to get my business off the ground. That drove me further into burnout and exhaustion.

It took me a while to pick up the pieces. It really wasn’t until I encountered Human Design that it all started making sense. From that point of view, explaining what I experienced from the lens of the system was quite a learning experience. It was very physical. My body basically just said, “No, I quit. I can’t do this anymore.” I had this idea about what it would mean to be independent or have my own consulting practice, and I got into it, and I realized, “Well, I’m working even harder, and it still is not working for me.” Yet, it seemed like something I needed to go through out of necessity. It’s like, this is just the way things are right now, so deal with it or basically just lose all of your income and everything collapses. Sometimes it seems like there are these conditions that we’re in. Again, I can kind of understand where people would want to do something different, to find another path, or to do something that is inspiring to them or meaningful to them.

Amy: I can really relate to what you were saying about seeing other people around. Probably most of them were Generators, and maybe some of them Manifestors, but a lot of them seem to just really go after their work, their pursuits, or their energy expenditure, whatever it is. They seem to have some kind of certainty or tenacity about that. It does seem to me, especially in American culture, that there’s pride about work. There’s something to be proud of in terms of what you create, and whether your work is something in professional realms, it’s something that you achieve on an educational level, or it’s something you produce on an artistic level, there’s this kind of high value on productivity, achievement, or what you’ve been able to create.

For me, I found that I could take a certain amount of pride or enjoyment out of some of those things, but I mostly just wanted to be with people and have good conversations. That was kind of all I really wanted to do. Maybe cook some good food sometimes and get inspired by things, but I didn’t have that same kind of ambition or drive. Coming into Design and getting to see that for myself, it was a relief to see that, “Oh, it’s unnatural for me to have a consistent driving, working productive energy in my life.” If we start to look at the different Types and what they’re about, I feel like what Human Design can do for people is to first just acknowledge, “Hey, maybe you are dissatisfied with the way things are, or maybe with the different programs or things you’ve been given for things that you grew up with. Things that you see happening around you don’t work for you. Before you go after creating something, let’s just pause and take a look at what you’re working with in terms of your own nature, your own body, your own health.”

It’s interesting that you mentioned health because I bet a lot of Projectors can relate to your story. It’s probably what a lot of us have experienced, or something all three of us have experienced at different times. Feeling overworked, exhausted, or burned out. If we look at it from the perspective of Type and health for Projector overwork, it can be a real detriment to your health. However, for a Generator, a lack of healthy or satisfying work can be a real detriment to health. Even just that one little point, I think, can be really revolutionary for people to recognize that we need different things and we’re built for different types of energy output and experiences. If we can tune into that, it’ll probably be easier to have a sense of just what’s right for us. Then, life kind of unfolds and takes a lot less effort, if we can get to that that’ll kind of align with our nature,

John: We’re not fighting against what we are, which may sound like a strong term or way to say it. It may be that the person is not even sure who or what they are, but if you have a sense of it, then go against it, and try to be something else in terms of the natural role that we’re here to play in life. If we’re talking about Projectors, we’re here to be guides. If we spend all our energy trying to either be a Producer, a Creator, or a Builder, to try to be the one who’s initiating things and bringing things into form, besides the fact that it may not work very well, it doesn’t allow us to actually be what we are, or to play the role that we’re here to play to be a Guide.

That’s not to say that Generators can’t be in guidance or counselor roles. They can, and do, and that’s fine, but if the whole focus of the Generator becomes on the other, in trying to guide the other’s energy, where from the point of view of Type and Human Design. If you flipped it, it’s the inverse of that dynamic between Projectors and Generators. The Generator probably wants to experience the satisfaction that comes from using its energy in a certain way. Then, you see the body as you’re saying, start to reflect that, trying to give us feedback, like, “Hey, I’m frustrated, I’m actually tired as a Generator. I’m using all my energy up, and it’s just not going anywhere. I don’t have anything to show for myself.” I think that’s what that Design can offer us is to come back and use that as kind of a point of reference or starting place. “Let’s just stop and see what we have here. Are we working with that? Are we honoring that or are we going against it?” As I said, this is its own type of self-aggression in a way on a more subtle level.

Kendra: Likewise for the Manifestor, not manifesting and initiating can be self-aggression, to hold their own horses. For the sake of the conditioning that they’ve lived in, as children growing up in a world that can be overwhelmed with the impact that they have. They kind of shut down in a way for them to start to open up again to being ignited in a sense so that they can do what they’re here to do, to allow their energy just to move naturally, wherever it wants to go. In a sense of responsibility in that way, to really honor their own type and inform the people around them of what they’re up to. One of you was, you had talked about the responsibility of the Manifestor in a sense and what the impact is.

John: I have a handful of really good Manifestor friends and talking with them, looking at it from both sides. There’s a little bit of this ‘grass is greener’ phenomenon going on there when we look at the manifestos in our society. There may be an element of envy, or it would be really nice to be the visionary, to be the one who starts things and kicks things off, who has that ability to bring things into form from within themselves. They are not waiting for something from the outside to happen. It looks attractive from a certain point of view, but what I have gathered and what I’m seeing in talking with my Manifestor friends, is that’s not all it’s made out to be. It’s not always comfortable to be in that role, where they’re the ones who carry that responsibility of having the vision or starting something. In the context of a relationship, it’s the one who’s initiating significant events or communications and things.

A good starting point, if you’re going to work with Human Design and experiment with that system, would be to start with, what are we energetically? What is our correct role and orientation in this world? Using that as a starting point, honoring that, as opposed to thinking that it’s better over there on the other side of the fence or, “If only I was a Manifestor?” What I hear a lot of times when I’m working with Manifestor clients, and I tell them that their type is Manifestor in their BodyGraph in Human Design is that they’re not always very excited to hear that. It’s probably partly because of conditioning. They’ve gone their whole life thinking that they’re supposed to respond, be a Generator, and work. They hear that the Manifestor has a quote, unquote repelling aura, and they don’t like the way that sounds. I think there’s a certain kind of weight that comes with being a Manifestor. In a way, it’s kind of silly to try to be something that we aren’t. Then, the flip side, kind of like you were saying earlier is, Manifestors who give up Manifesting. Those who basically are running around doing all the work in response all the time, are conditioned to be a Generator, and that doesn’t work either. We’re not really in our correct lane in life, or in Human Design language, on our correct trajectory in life, when we’re operating that way.

Amy: I think it can be something that’s interesting to look at. When I look at people trying to create what they want, or trying to get in touch with what they want and then see things come into reality is to slow things down. The question is almost to me, what do you want? To look, who is it? What part of it in you is it that wants that thing? Why? I think when we slow things down, you do a reading, or you look at a chart deeply, you can often see what part of the Design, whether it’s the Nature, the Not-Self, or the conditioning, it’s going after something. To bring it back there actually just puts a pause on everything. It’s complicated, being a human, being in this world.

Sometimes when I see a lot of the stuff that’s out there about, what are you creating? Do you have the life you want? How do you get what you want? One of the biggest things I feel is I just want everybody to just slow down and press pause. Let’s stop and just take a look at what’s going on in there, before we keep going faster into more action to try to do something about what we want, what we don’t like, or what we’d prefer. Let’s just pause and see what we are working with here.

I think often like you’re saying, John, when you describe somebody’s type to them, there’s often this mixture of relief in feeling a recognition in it, and at the same time, a sort of resistance in not wanting to be bound to that or wishing that it could be different. I always feel when I see that, if you don’t like your Design as it is, or if there’s something about it that you wish were different. That’s just a sign that you haven’t lived it fully. You haven’t fully experienced it, because if you fully experienced it, you would love it. You would love what you are. It’s just the natural outgrowth of being aligned with our nature. That’s what I feel something like this can bring to each of us. It’s almost like we’ve got to get that sorted out, or it’s helpful to get that sorted out, and then have some things to play with in this material co-creative reality that we find ourselves in, or this time-space reality that we find ourselves in. Have some tools to then go experiment with and see if you can find out that there is some natural place for you, and it’s already there, and you don’t have to create it, you could actually just let go of it.

John: It’s like being comfortable in your own skin or having a nice fitting outfit or set of clothes. It brings to mind a lot of the stories I’ve heard, where someone can go out there- let’s say a Projector can go out there and initiate something. Maybe they worked really hard to bring it into form, to create something, build a business. From the outside, it looks like they have achieved a certain level of success, that they’ve done it, but then you talk to them, and you realize that they’re actually not very happy in that situation they created. It looks good from the outside, but it’s like something doesn’t fit quite right, or something’s off. It’s kind of like an ill-fitting set of clothes. There becomes this whole process of, “How do I get out of this? I’ve built this, this is my income,” or “I’m directly tied to it, people are depending on me, and I’m stuck.” It kind of begs the question of whether that was correct in the first place. Correct, meaning a representation of being in alignment with yourself on a more true or authentic level, as opposed to just kind of going out there. Again, following some other program that has been given to us thinking that that’s going to bring us the satisfaction or success that we thought we wanted.

Kendra: Unless you’re a Generator, and you’ve responded to doing it.

John: Right, which is great. It’s a great point to make. I don’t want to sit here and say that the other types, the Non-Manifester types, can’t bring things into form, can’t have a certain life, or go after something, and then make it happen. I think we have to look at under what conditions that tends to work best. As you just pointed out, if you’re a Generator, and someone brings you something and says, “Hey, you want to jump on board with this thing and come help make this a reality?” Your energy lights up, and you’re excited. You can just feel it in your body and your body’s just waking up and going into action. That’s a pretty good indication that it’s going to feel satisfying to go work in that way, or to use your energy in that way. You’ll probably be able to sustain it if it’s correct for you. You’ll reap the rewards from it.

If you’re a Projector and you get invited in, like, “Hey, we’ve got this startup or this business, and we need you for this specific role. We know that only you can do it, and we’ll pay you whatever you want.” That’s a very different situation. I’m going to go out there and work my ass off as a Projector, and just live or die based on the success of this thing. As we were touching on earlier, at what cost? I think we can all manifest in certain conditions. The way people are commonly using this word. If we don’t have a strong point of reference for what actually works for us, and what’s healthy for us, in an orientation to our correct role, it’s like we’re just off the rails in a way and within ourselves, at least, it’s been my experience.

Amy: It’s good to know that we each have a way to be able to create. It is possible. I was reading something that was talking about creating your life or tending to your life as if you were a gardener. You can look out there, and there are some farmers or farming methods that go out and they just like to strip the land down and pump it with chemicals and throw things in there and mass produce whatever and that’s one kind of experience. What a system like Human Design offers is a way of interacting with life where you are- it is an interactive participatory process. It’s not like we’re victims of our lives, but we also have the potential to be consulting and checking in with what is the season, what is the timing, who is available, what is around me, and how to interact with that. What we grow is unique and beautiful, and in a way, it kind of takes on a life of its own. That’s what I imagine a lot of people would feel when they’re aligned with their nature. It doesn’t feel so much like work, it feels like something natural is happening even for a Manifestor.

I see a lot of Manifestors who struggle with relationships in the same way that you see a lot of Projectors that struggle with money. In some ways, I want to encourage those Manifestors to just focus on those impulses and those actions that they want. Announce them to the world and inform the people who need to know. Eventually, if you just stick with that, the people that are right for you will hang with you. They’ll want to be part of your creations, they’ll join you in what you’re doing. If you’re trying to establish a relationship first, before you let yourself take action on the things that you feel the impulse for, I think you’re going to get off base as a Manifestor and for a lot of other types, too. I think there can be this focus on trying to get certain things in place before allowing ourselves to do what feels natural to us, like trying to get the right people on board or trying to set things up in a certain way. We’ll allow ourselves to do what feels natural to us.

For Generators, I think it’s so important if you just listen to that energy like you’re talking about. Follow that energy that’s within you, let yourself. Let life come to you and let yourself respond to it. Then, see what happens. I think all of us in our types, we can get really influenced by trying to keep or orchestrate relationships in our lives. It’s interesting, I’m going into a whole other topic now. I’m just thinking about how much writing Ra, the creator of Human Design, or the revealer of Human Design, has written about the right relationships. He’s really written that for all types; the people you have in your life are so important, no matter what type you are. A huge part of what people are trying to get really focused on manifesting has to do with relationships or love or partnership. However, what Human Design shows is that if you just focus on being what you are, and being in your own nature, that’s what will enable the people that are correct for you to actually see you. It’s almost like we can’t find each other if we’re all mired under piles of confusion and trying to be what we’re not and going here and going there. It’s all conditioning, and there’s all this big mess. How can we even find each other? To be like, “Oh, I see you. Okay, yes.”

John: We’re in the wrong costume.

Amy: The costume is all confused. There are like 17 different costumes, you can’t even see what I’m actually wearing. In terms of relationships, I think that a lot of people will take action out of a fear of rejection or something. They’ll construct what they do based on not wanting to be rejected. That can be on a business level, at trying to market your business in a way that you won’t get rejected or that so that you’re appealing, or it can be in relationships. Either way, if you go about manifesting something that way, I don’t think it allows the right players and the right people to actually see what you are. Then, to partner with you and be part of your life and bring out what you’re really here for in that way almost feels like rejection is a good thing.

If you are aligned with your nature, and you allow yourself to follow what feels right for your energy, or to express yourself in the way that feels most natural to you. If there are people who don’t like it, who reject you, or who move away from you, good. Otherwise, you would have been trying to do this whole thing to keep this person in your life based on something that you probably wouldn’t enjoy maintaining anyway. If you really stripped it down, you probably don’t wouldn’t like them that much anyway. The no response for a Generator, or the rejection that can happen with a Manifestor that they might feel, or for a Projector, the lack of recognition you might feel with people if somebody doesn’t see you. Good, that’s showing you go elsewhere. It’s not for you, you can just let it go. It’s a lot less effort, I think.

John: That resonates quite a bit here. As a Projector, I can look back on my life, on so many occasions where I was essentially compromising myself out of some desire for recognition and going into a situation like, let’s say a job interview or a job possibility. As a Generator, I’m showing up as a Generator saying, “I’m here to work hard for you day to day, to sit in your cube, to grind it out. Who’s responsible for that? If I’m coming in that way, and I’m not presenting myself or representing myself, or if I’m trying to be something different than I am, you can’t blame the other person. They don’t know Human Design, and they don’t know that’s not going to be healthy for you, work for you, or be sustainable. We’ve got to get clear on that ourselves. What are we about? Who are we? What are we? From that point, we can see what’s there. We can have the awareness of things as they are, and look around and say, “Well, what relationships in my life are correct, or which ones are not correct? What is the correct place for me?” Then, if we have something like Inner Authority, and in our strategy, of course, if you’re waiting in some form, and then when either our authority moves, turns on or becomes clear, then we can take the next step. We can go further, we can put ourselves out there from that place, and then see what comes in. I don’t think any of this is really encouraging people to be passive or do nothing, just maybe more passive than you have been. Maybe hold back, like you’re saying, slow down, and just stop for a moment. Let’s take inventory. Let’s get clear on what’s going on here. Then, let’s see what’s possible.

Kendra: It seems like there’s a lot of room for forgiveness along the way and compassion for that learning curve. Recognizing what hasn’t worked and trying something new. Trying it out. It is, after all, an experiment, Human Design, and life. It’s a big story. I think that earlier, what was coming up for me too, you were talking about this movement towards as a process of Manifestation. Often moving towards something is actually on the outside. It might look like we’re moving towards something, but on the inside, avoiding or moving away from something. Even to the degree of not wanting to experience the Not-Self themes, anything that’s uncomfortable, or saying, “I’m doing it wrong.” If I’m feeling my Not-Self theme, and really, we can partner with those experiences and with that body awareness as an internal directive, that’s what strategy and authority are all about. To guide us through that process, rather than feeling like we’ve done something wrong along the way.

Amy: I think you’re speaking to a kind of attitude that I found most helpful in therapy training I’ve been in where the foundation of being with a person in their process. I think also, one of the best foundations for ourselves in our own process is a kind of attitude that is open and curious. Instead of being so quick to judge, fix, alter, or perfect this experience, let’s just pause and be curious about it. What is this showing me? “Oh, that got kind of weird. Maybe that didn’t quite work out,” or, “Oh, I didn’t think I would like this but it actually feels really good.” If we can have the room to not know, and not have to, like you’re saying, do it right or make it perfect from the start, then I think that’s what we’re here to manifest. It reveals itself to us. Then, it’s this beautiful discovery. That’s a pretty big thing that Human Design is putting out that does not necessarily align with all other kinds of systems. It’s putting out this awareness that life is already there for you. You just have to align with it and see it. You don’t have to make it. It’s already been made, you’re already here. As a starting point, if we were just like, “I already made it, already made, it’s done.” Now all there is to do is to kind of enjoy it, watch it, feel it, walk through it, but it’s already there for us.

Kendra: Recognize and include our preferences. and allow things to not look like what we think they’re gonna look like.

Amy: I think it’s a lot more stigma, personally. Well, I think we spanned some territory. Thanks for you guys. Glad we could open this up. I’m sure there’ll be more to unfold from here.